So thank you. Yes, you.

on

Thank you.

Thank you for each time you left me hanging and walked away, because I knew right then the girth of my own palms. I knew right then that I needed no one but myself to pull me up and keep going. So thanks.

Thank you for all the times you treated me like I was invisible, like I didn’t exist, like I didn’t matter, because it made me want to do more than exist in a silent corner, it made me want to go out into the world and roar like the lioness I am, it made me want to seize life and squeeze the living hell out of it. So thanks.

Thank you for all those times you were too busy for me, for when you treated me like an option, because it made me look at those people in my life who always kept me top priority and it made me realize how truly blessed I am to have so many people who love me unconditionally. So thanks.

Thank you for every tear you almost had me shed, because I knew then how much I needed laughter, and I would find it, sometimes in the smallest things, and I would laugh boisterously till my insides hurt, and I knew it was laughter giving me the pain your tears almost did, and I would be grateful. So thanks.

Thank you for every time you did things that I couldn’t make sense of, for every time you’ve been so difficult I’d wanna throw myself against a brick wall, because it made me pause, step back and think, and each time I realized how little one person, any one person, should be able to impact me, and even when it still hurt at least I always knew that the pain would pass, and with it, your ugly shadow. So thanks.

Thank you for all the times you acted like I was second, or third best, because it made me wanna be first so bad. It made me wanna be first so bad and I didn’t know where to find that so I turned inwards, and made myself the best, and I learnt to never allow anyone to make me feel second best. So thanks.

Thank you for moving on, for forgetting me with the speed of light, because it made me realize how I’m different from you. It made me realize that even while you pained me more than I wished to admit to myself, it meant that I was given a different heart. I was given a heart that retains memories in the gashes and feelings in the scars, a heart that could stop for you a million times over but still start to beat, for myself. You showed me the beauty and strength in the person I was created to be with juxtaposition. So thanks.

Thank you, you, and you because you’ve only ever given to me, it just took me some time to see that.

Some Queen B to comply.

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